So much has happened in these fast years, Lord. So many adventures, so many surprises, so many opportunities to seek You, some taken, some lost. I find myself revisiting feelings that led me to start this blog in the first place. Sometimes it takes this longing, this loneliness and feelings of incompetency that lead us back to You.
Here I am standing on the brink of my final year of undergrad. Amid the craziness of saying goodbye to some of the most amazing people I have ever had the blessing of knowing (class of 2014 dancers, I'm looking at you), a question keeps bubbling up in my heart. Where will I go after I leave this place? So much went into deciding this was the path I would take and now it's already time to make the next big move. Will it be a big move? Or will it be a safe return back to Jacksonville as if my 4 years at JMU were the most I would ever do?
It's time to trust again. It's time to internalize again. It's time to find you in the quiet of my heart again. The world has once again proved not enough. This discomfort in my heart scares me but also fills me with hope that I can come back to You and You will guide me to the next big thing. No matter how big or small it may be.
So thank You Lord. Thank You for always being available for me, when I know I need You and even when I forget. I feel like I have changed so much in these past 2 years but there is so much comfort in knowing that You have not. You are the same today as you were when I was a brokenhearted freshman longing to find my place in the JMU world. You are the same today as you will be exactly one year from now, a grown-up wiser version of that broken hearted girl. In a way I am the same too. I will always need my Father.
Deep calls to deep in the roar of Your waterfalls; all Your waves and breakers have swept over me.
Psalm 42:7